That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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