from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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