How'd it feel making her break her religion?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
