just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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