I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
