i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize