She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
So much Jack, so little girl.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
