I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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