i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
