Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
