My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
