i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
