Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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