Three words: puerto rican gang bang
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
