did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
