hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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