As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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