just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize