marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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