chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
and she was petting her beer can
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
