I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize