We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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