Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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