That's intense
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
