It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
