It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Holy shit dude........stairs
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