i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Randomize