quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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