Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
