you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
