Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize