you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Randomize