she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
You took a bar mat shot.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
