There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
