There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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