i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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