Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize