if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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