Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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