you guys were way drunker than both of me
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Pooping to opera.
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