so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
