I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
