just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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