my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
