This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
