Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
