At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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