did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
