I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
