youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
