My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
