just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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